Hardest Week of My Life...

This will be a hard post for me to write, but I've been told it's good therapy for me...

Thursday morning of last week (October 7th) I got the kids up early and ready to go to a Doctor's appointment.  It was much like any other morning.  When we drove down our street I noticed there were a lot of police cars, fire engines and people crowded around the bottom of the street.  I quickly turned down another road to "avoid" the road block and went on with my day.  At the Doctor's office I got a text from a friend saying "Madison Mecum was hit by a car this morning waiting at her bus stop and was life-flighted to Primary Children's Hospital.  She's in critical condition."  My jaw dropped as I realized all the commotion at the bottom of my street just one hour ago was for her!  I panicked, fought back the tears and said multiple prayers in-between the Doctor coming in and out of the room.  "No, please don't take her" was all I could say -- I guess it was more pleading than praying.  During that time there were many prayers said by everyone who knew Madison as she was such a bubbly, fun, and happy 13 year old in our ward.  She was one of my beehives in Young Women's, Nora's favorite babysister, and a friend to everyone.  By the time I got home from the Doctor's office, I got a another text saying Maddie had passed away.  All I did for hours was sob and ask why?...why her?... hasn't her family been through enough already?

And this is why it was the hardest week of my life.  Sure I've had to deal with death in my life...I've had loved ones pass away, but usually after living a long and happy life and we were expecting it.  Never have I had something hit me with such shock and emotion.  Such a pure, amazing person that suddenly got taken from us.  I was not ready for this kind of pain - the emotional pain that doesn't let you sleep at night, that doesn't let you think of anything else, that almost makes you doubt your faith in a way.

Sweet Madison  ( June10th 1997 -- October 7th 2010)

In the passing days, obviously Madison's mom Paige wanted space -- and that was one of the only things I felt like I could give her.  That, and my time....  So, I began to sew.  I sewed and sewed.  It was more for the therapy of accepting what happened to Madison that I continued to sew into the wee hours of the night even though my fingers and back ached.  I had to finish for Paige.  Luckily, with some small miracles on my side like my amazing quilter lady doing all the top quilting in less than a day (and for free), my sister Lisa giving up her whole Sunday night to help me with the embroidery, and then me being able to get all the hand-binding done in 1 1/2 hours when clearly it was at least a 4 hour binding job... I did finish, and was able to give it to Paige the night before the funeral.

The circle in the center of the quilt represented eternity never-ending.

Madison's picture, birth and death date were embroidered in the top.

  The whole thing (twin size). This is a bad picture though, I was in a huge hurry!

Everyone has special moments in their life.  You know those moments that you never forget and are sealed away in your memories.  Special moments like getting married, seeing your babies for the first time, or watching your husband graduate after 5 years of grueling research.  Giving that quilt to Paige was one of those special moments in my life that I will never forget.  I gave my love and time to someone that was hurting so much, yet showed so much gratitude at the same time...  It was astonishing!  And then and there, my faith was strengthened and there was no room for doubt anymore.  And I realized, this is what it's all about....  This is why we serve, this is why we love, this is why we give our time and talents to others.  To strengthen the faith and bonds of those around us and leave no room for doubt!  There's nothing to compare that moment to.

The funeral services were just as special, and the outpouring of love has been amazing.  I don't think there has been a single person that hasn't been touched by the spirit of love and charity shown toward that little family.   Madison has left a huge empty spot in our hearts by not being here any more... but I know what she would want us to fill that space with.  She lived her short life that way, and now we should too.

Beautiful flowers given to me from Madison's funeral.  I wish they could stay like this forever.